Red Flags for Adults and Children to Spot

*top behaviors in each stage, not all boundary breaking behaviors are listed

Mom and Daughter

Stage 1: Victim Selection

Offender will single out compliant, trustworthy children/teens who often have low self-esteem and/or who lack supervision.

Stage 2: Gaining Access

Offender then gains access through having unsupervised time alone with a child, spending increased time with the family, and emotionally isolating them.

Stage 3: Trust Development

While the offender develops trust with his/her community by being involved organizations being charming, he/she also becomes invaluable to child and family through giving care, time, attention, compliments, and gifts.

Stage 4: Desensitization

Offender then spends time getting physically close to a child (including "accidentally touching"), "accidentally" walking in on a child while in bathroom or changing, and talking in explicit or sexual terms. These behaviors will increase in a sexual way and frequency over time.

ABUSE HAPPENS

If you suspect abuse call your local DHR or law enforcement agency

Stage 5: Maintenance

After abuse has happened or is continuing to happen, offender will use techniques to keep the child quiet from disclosure. The techniques can include telling the child to keep it a secret or threatening them to keep secret, that the behavior is normal/natural behavior, shaming them, and/or rewarding/bribing them.

Disclosure and Making A Report

It's the adult's responsibility to report abuse to AUTHORITIES and/or DHR.

If a child discloses abuse to you:

  1. Remain calm and believe the child
  2. Allow the child to talk and show compassion
  3. Reassure the child that they were brave and you were proud of them for trusting you.
  4. Make a report to DHR or local authorities, this could save the child’s life

*Do NOT ask for specifics or press the child to talk- this can impact the legal process
*Do NOT make promises to the child or blame the child for the maltreatment

workforce-development

Report Abuse If:

  • You SUSPECT abuse- You witness red-flag behaviors like boundaries being crossed consistently, especially multiple boundaries. You do NOT have to have evidence to report abuse, only a good-faith suspicion.
  • You DISCOVER abuse- You witness a child being abused, someone tells you about an incident of a child being abused, or you discover evidence (like photo/ video) of abuse.
  • A child DISCLOSES- A child discloses to you that they have experienced abuse or are currently being abused.

How to Make a Report

  • Take a deep breath, this may make you nervous but a child’s well-being is in question.
  • Make a report if you suspect abuse or have a reasonable suspicion that it has occurred.
  • A report needs to be given orally to local authorities or DHR. For the report you need:
    • Name and age of alleged victim
    • If there are any other children in the home
    • Address where the child can be located (very least school if address is unknown)
    • Contact information of child’s parents/ caregivers (if known)
    • Reason for making the report (suspicion, discovery, disclosure)

If you are still on the fence about whether a report should be made: There are people who can help

  • Department of Human Resources- they are very good about helping you walk through the report being made.
  • Call your county’s Child Advocacy Center (CAC). They help coordinate the MDT’s (multi-disciplinary team) when a report is made, they can help talk you through the process. To find yours, visit www.nca-online.org.
  • National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656- HOPE (4673)
  • ChildHelp USA National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453)
Family members with pet
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